I've always passionately felt that the purpose and meaning in my life have come from striving to be a force of good, show love, and reflect the beauty of life. Purpose and meaning live within every breath, every moment, and every relationship: we merely have to choose to see its presence. Purpose and meaning are living and breathing within each of us.
Has purpose sought me, or have I been determined to find it? With this new season of life set before me and the impact CF has so recently made, the weight of life's purpose greatly weighs on my consciousness. I can't help but question my own understanding of what my purpose is and if I am truly fulfilling what I believe to be the meaning of life. Have I shared goodness? Love? Reflected the beauty that is present within my life? Have I made any difference? How can I give more, be a part of a greater good? I feel these days that I've been shown much more good than I've been able to share, and that I've taken much more than I've been able to give. I am overwhelmed by the goodness and love I have been so generously shown.
I knew this current battle and road to healing was going to be a long and demanding journey, but I honestly didn't really believe it. After all, I am the master of mind over matter. There's simply no way CF would be able to keep up with me and my shear will and drive for life. Right? Honestly, I was wrong: my body has betrayed me. I am at a loss for words at the ruthless power of CF and its ability to cause such devastation: violently stripping me of my strength, vibrancy, and resilience. After 16 continuous weeks of trying different cocktails of IV antibiotics and approaches, my team and I are still doing our very best to fight CF and combat its current merciless attack. I cannot begin to adequately express my gratitude to my team for their tireless dedication, time, genuine care, and commitment to not giving up on me. They've each gifted my life with so much meaning and beauty. CF may be strong, but we will always be stronger. My life has great purpose and meaning, and I will reflect the beauty of life no matter the battle I face.
Open your eyes. Purpose and meaning are living within you and are present all around you.