Friday, May 6, 2016
The Gift of Sight
Gifts come in many different forms and often by means we do not expect. But, in everything there is beauty – we just have to see it.
As I looked down at you, beneath my breath was an abundance of tears I dare note let overtake me. Within every tiny breath I saw the most perfect grace. A grace I could only hope to share with you through my loving arms that held you. I love you already because you are a mere tiny reflection of the dearest people who fill my heart.
I take a long and slow breath as to keep the tears and torrent of emotion from overwhelming me. I think to myself, “I thought I might never get to see this day.” And I close my eyes and whisper the words, “thank you” – stitching them upon the breath of a silent prayer.
This scenario and these words have resonated within me many times in the past year, each time with even more gratitude to be present and alive. Each time, wanting more desperately to hold that moment and its beauty in my hands forever. Each time realizing what a true gift I’ve been given. There are few more cherished and treasured moments in my life than these occasions. I relish in these moments and my heart and mind wander down a path of remembrance. A place where the deepest appreciation lives for the beauty that fills my life and the grace that has brought me to this very moment. A place in which I know could be so very different or cease to even exist at all.
A Priceless Gift
Cystic Fibrosis may remind me daily of the things it has stolen and dares to rip from my life, but CF has also given me something so very priceless. It’s given me the gift of sight – an awareness that grounds me to the beauty that lives within every breath and fills every moment. The gift of sight that opens me to a world many do not take the time to see and appreciate. It’s hidden beneath the fullness and chaos of our busy lives. It gets lost beneath what seems ordinary.
But I truly see so very much – and it is a gift.
What I See
In this life I may not have been given the gift and title of being called, “mom” (at least by something that’s not covered in fur, barks, and walks on four legs), but I’ve been given a gift so very beautiful in its own right. I have watched my dearest of friends become mothers. I’ve watched my friends grow in the most beautiful and honest of ways. There were several times in the past couple of years that I feared I would not be here to witness such a thing – making each of these moments more special beyond words.
As I look down at you, I see your tiny delicate fingers and hands – so full of unassuming possibility. I see the gift you are to all those who will love you. I think of your beautiful mom and the irreplaceable gift she is in my own life and what a gift it is to see her be your mom. The world is yours, little one - breathe bravely.
Love to all the beautiful and impactful women who have shaped each of us into the people we are today.